Thursday, February 01, 2007

Life 1.1

You know, I have everything I ever really wanted in life. I have a beautiful wife, and intelligent son, and a decent job. Yet something is amiss.
I still can't put my finger on what exactly what.
Now my wife and I are expecting our second child (as you probably already know from her blog), and pregnancy has historically not been easy on her. Between the hormones and the morning sickness (not to mention the afternoon and evening sickness), and taking care of a two year old she is frazzled, almost all the time. There are of course other factors not listed here that contribute (I could be here all night listing some of the stresses in our lives right now), but it boils down to she acts broken a lot of the time. Like her spirit has been crushed.
The last few years have been hard, harder then life for good decent folks has any right to be. Even myself who is usually upbeat and feel like I can conquer anything, have been down lately.
I have to remind myself now not to get mad at things every once in a wile, I always told my wife I do not get mad. I still don't, but it takes effort some days.
I am rambling....
It could turn at any minuet into a rather nice rant, but I don't see the point really.
As the only one in the house not affected by evil hormone swings (and who is not two) it's my job to be the one who stays calm at all times and keeps a level head.
On the subject of rambling (and sense it is just so hard to judge tone from any of this). I have to say I really do love my wife.
She might not think so some days, but she is still smart, and she is still capable (one of the more capable people I know actually).
Even if her job makes her crazy sometimes, and our two year old make her crazy sometimes (heck even if I make her crazy sometimes), it's because she cares so much, about everything that makes her that way (crazy that is).
Her spirit isn't broken, if it was broken she wouldn't be passionate about things like she is. She just takes everything to heart deeply.
Well that's enough rambling for one night.
I hope our country wake up from the nightmare we have been in, I am tired of feeling like good guy in the evil country.


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